When Ruby turned one year old, the pediatrician and I saw several signs that led us to believe she probably had autism. We decided to begin the long process of testing. Although I consented the testing, I was not going to accept this as her fate. I would fight back!
I contacted Jennifer Tow again and we began the GAPS diet. Although Ruby was over a year at this point, she had not even reached all of her six month landmarks. Within a few short months, she was meeting all her landmarks.
Although she was meeting landmarks and we saw enormous progress, somethings still didn’t seem right. She never really began to talk. We started her in speech therapy around the time of her second birthday. The Speech Pathologist (who is wonderful) gave us exercises to stimulate and “awaken” the muscles in her her mouth. BOOM! Speech!
She could say words!
It was pulling teeth to even get her to put two words together. Ridiculous!
Other things still weren’t right!
Despite being potty trained since May, she still has several accidents. It seems like she can’t help it. I don’t understand. My husband doesn’t understand. It’ confusing! Why is she struggling with this? She knows how to use the potty.
She falls. Constantly! Aways busting her lip, scrapping her knee, running into something. It’s ridiculous. She runs funny.
Despite working with her on it, she can’t consistently recall colors, numbers, or animals. She’ll know it one day and then the next she’s completely lost.
She looks at me funny sometimes. Kinda stone faced. We can get her to laugh. Her giggle is contagious and sweet. She’s beautiful when she smiles. But portions of her face often seem…. different…..
She can’t hold her attention long enough to watch a cartoon, no matter how short. I can’t read books to her. She is unaware of her surroundings. Completely unaware.
She has no sense of danger. Urgency in voices do not affect her. Oblivious.
I have often feared for her. I fear that she would be taken advantage of, abused, molested. No one would ever know because she doesn’t communicate or even seem to know something is wrong and needs to be communicated. It’s easy to be ugly to her and not apologize because she doesn’t even seem to hardly notice. She doesn’t show signs of hurt feelings, disappointment, or rejection.
I often lay hands on her during prayer. I am willing to admit there’s something wrong and to see treatment for it. But I refuse to accept that she will be this way her whole life. I will not accept that she will not know normal friendships and relationships. I will keep seeking and praying for answers. I often pray in the Spirit for her. I don’t know what needs to happen, but God does!
“Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit itself maketh intercessions for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.” Romans 8:26
I don’t even know where to start looking. I keep my eye out for articles, posts, ideas from other people. But I don’t know where to go. So I pray that God brings the answer to me.
And that he did…